By Alison Angold | Qualified Aromatherapist | CIDESCO ITEC
We can all have times when we lack self-confidence. Lack of self-confidence or self-esteem can accompany anxiety and depression and can be one of the causes of these issues. Or a crisis of confidence can be a one-off, or occasional feeling we have when we are going through a difficult time or perhaps have a big event that we need to be prepared for.
Either way, a lack of self-confidence can be difficult to deal with, so it is useful to find remedies that can help with this issue.
Self-care is an important part of rebuilding confidence and self-esteem, in that, if we can find ways to nurture, nourish and take care of ourselves we automatically feel better about ourselves.
Using essential oils to promote self-confidence and encourage self-care can be the natural way to resolve these problems.
The best essential oils to promote self-confidence
- Clary sage
- Ylang Ylang
Essential oils are the natural oils that are extracted from the leaves and flowers of plants, the peel of fruits or even the bark and resin of trees. Each oil is made up of unique complex chemicals and have a variety of properties or therapeutic actions, which means they can have an effect on the body and more importantly for self-confidence, the mind.
Essential oils for boosting self confidence and self esteem and for taking care of yourself can work in the following ways;
- Balancing – these oils create balance in your emotions or balance the activity in areas of the body. For example, they can help regulate heartrate, breathing rate and nerve activity in the case of heightened anxiety or nervousness.
- Calming – has an overall calming effect on the body and mind, so can bring us clarity when in difficult situations and as a result, helps us feel more confident.
- Cephalic – oils that have cephalic properties help to clear and focus the mind. When we have self -doubt it is often difficult to think straight.
- Relaxing – these oils have a general relaxing effect on the body and mind which is useful for lack of self-confidence associated with anxiety.
- Sedative – calms the nervous system. Again useful, to calm heightened or erratic nerve activity, associated with stress or anxiety.
- Tonic – these oils invigorate and give strength to a specific area or the whole body as needed. Invigorated, well working body systems will feel better emotionally and physically, to be able to cope better with situations.
- Uplifting – helps positive thinking and lifts the emotions. Ideal oils to use to promote positive thinking and boost self-esteem.
The best essential oils to promote self-confidence and encourage self-care
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One of the best oils to use to instil self-confidence, and boost self-esteem, jasmine has a great effect on the nervous system, not only uplifting the emotions and helping with symptoms of depression, it also calms the nerves and warms the emotions. Find out more ways to use Jasmine essential oil here.
Relieves feelings of apathy and revives when motivation is low. Myrrh stimulates and revives the nervous system, lifting us up when we feel low and giving us motivation while easing general lethargy.
Uplifts a low mood and helps relieve the symptoms of depression. Basil is also ideal at clearing a foggy mind, which can often impede our clarity of thought and bring us down, not helping with a low self esteem.
Like most citrus oils is uplifting, so helps us think more positively, while clearing and refreshing the mind. By simply clearing our minds of negative thoughts, can be an enormous boost to our self confidence.
Uplifts us and promotes feelings of well-being and euphoria, which can be a huge boost to our self-confidence and self-esteem. Along with this, it relieves feelings of panic and nervous tension, acting as a natural relaxant and sedative. Use when you need a boost of confidence or on a regular basis to instil a feeling of well-being and positivity about yourself. More benefits of Clary sage here.
Rose is a natural anti-depressant, so not only relieving the symptoms of low mood and depression but actually stimulates positive thinking and positive emotions. Rose is really useful to use in times of low self-esteem or low confidence, or when experiencing feelings of jealousy, sadness or grief. It has a very balancing effect on the nervous system.
An anti-depressant and sedating oil, ylang ylang calms the central nervous system, so relieves anxiety or nervous tension, at the same time as creating feelings of joy and promoting positive thoughts.
Vetiver has its greatest effects on the nervous system and particularly the mind. It calms the central nervous system so reduces tension, worry and anxiety, in fact, any stress related symptoms.
Any citrus oil will help to boost self confidence as they have uplifting and refreshing properties. A sunny oil that will brighten your mood and lift your spirits!
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How to use essential oils to promote self-confidence and practise self-care
Performing some massage movements on yourself is a great way to use essential oils to practise self-care, while instilling self-confidence too. The movements will help relax tense muscles and frazzled nerve endings, and a relaxed, calm body feels more confident and ready to face the world. Check out more details and info about why you should have regular aromatherapy massage here!
An aromatherapy bath gives your body and mind a chance to relax, while gaining the benefits of the essential oils. Prepare a blend and add to your bath, during the evening, so you are readying yourself for sleep. A good nights sleep is essential to gain self confidence.
For an on the go, confidence boost, keep and essential oil roller blend with you to apply as and when needed. Fill a roller ball container with some sweet almond oil and use any of the following blends of essential oils. Apply onto your pulse points and inhale when you feel you need a boost.
Burning essential oils in a burner or diffuser is an ideal way to benefit and improve self esteem and self confidence. This allows the aromas and their benefits to fill the air and be inhaled to give a positive effect.
essential oil recipes to promote self-confidence
Massage oil blend for self-confidence
50ml Sweet almond oil, 7 drops lavender, 7 drops jasmine and 6 drops lemon
This is a lovely blend that will help the body relax, but not sedate it, so ideal to use during the day to give a boost to ourselves and instil a sense of confidence.
Relaxing bath oil blend for self-care and self-confidence
50ml Soybean oil, 8 drops Lavender, 8 drops Vetiver & 4 drops Rose
A lovely soothing blend to use in an evening bath. This is an ultimate self care ritual. The warm water added to the benefits of the essential oils will help you get a restful nights sleep, enabling you to wake up more refreshed and positive.
Use a 10ml rollerball bottle, like these, fill it with sweet almond oil and add 2-3 drops of each of the following oils. Carry with you and apply to pulse points, whenever you need a boost.
Clary sage & lavender – a boost of well-being and euphoria, while relaxing body and mind
Basil, Lemon & Orange – a bright fragrance that boosts positivity, happy thoughts and gives clarity of mind.
Jasmine, Myrhh & Lemon – Floral jasmine, earthy myrhh and citrusy lemon blend well to uplift our emotions and fill us with confidence, positivity and motivation
Diffuser blends to promote self-confidence & Encourage self -care
A diffuser or a burner is a great way to use essential oils to promote self-confidence and instil self-care, as you can create so many different blends, depending on how you feel, and allow the aroma to fill the air, so that you can inhale that goodness all day.
Try these blends for your diffuser;
Motivation & Apathy blend – Jasmine, Myrrh & Orange
Calming the nerves blend – Vetiver, Ylang Ylang & Lavender
Uplifiting & Euphoric blend – Jasmine, Lemon & Clary sage
Essential oil products to promote self-confidence & encourage self-care
Blending your own essential oil products is very simple and fun to do, however there are a range of ready blended products to buy. Try any of these to build confidence, uplift emotions and promote positivity.
Other ways to promote self-confidence
I have suffered with anxiety for most of my life, and while I have manged to adapt a lot to allow for this, I am aware that my anxiety has a lot to do with lack of self confidence and lack of self esteem. Alongside using essential oils, here are some of the other things I do to help myself.
Thinking positive is easier said than done, and when someone tells you to ‘think positive’ you feel like screaming! However, if you are having a bad time, while the term think positive will grate on you and be no help at the time, thinking of the positives in your life can help.
Anxiety and the way we feel about ourselves when we are anxious, can have a lot to do with self esteem. We feel bad about ourselves in general, and even more so when we are anxious, low or depressed.
Nobody can think positive all the time, and when in a slump, its hard to think of nothing but the negative things that are going on, and how bad you feel. But trying to think of some small positives that are happening, is a good practise to do. So begin by thinking of one small good thing that has happened today. However small, or irrelevant you think it is, just try. It could be as simple as;
- You had your favourite coffee with your breakfast
- The sun is shining
- Someone smiled at you in the street
- You watched your favourite TV show
OK, so these are really minor things that probably occur on a daily, or regular basis. But, it shows you that you do have good/positive things in your life. Everyone should be able to find one small thing that is good in their day. Keep doing this – every day – and then you will start to notice the bigger positive things happening. These were some of my bigger, more noticeable positives, when I started this practise;
- I went on a dog walk with beautiful scenery
- I made someone laugh with something I said
- Another mum stopped me in the school playground to ask about my holiday
- Someone else said ‘We should catch up soon’
Again, these may seem ordinary to some people but to me these were amazingly positive, out of the ordinary, feel-good moments! The last two particularly – with my social anxiety, I have always assumed that people think I’m boring or dull, but the fact that these people, chose to talk to me, was monumental for me! And the more you look for these positives, the more you will find and the more they will outweigh, and steer you away from the negative thoughts.
So eventually the small things become the big things and you realise that you have plenty of positives going on in your life. Write these things down as they happen or occur to you, so when you are feeling anxious, low or depressed you can refer to them and you will feel better
Listen to music
It’s very easy to wallow when we feel low. Its so easy when we feel sad and down to listen to sad, slow tunes. But, I challenge you to find a song that makes you feel better. ‘Feel-good’ is a bit of a cheesy phrase, but a song that has lyrics that mean something about feeling good, or getting through tough times, can really help you feel better. My suggestions are;
Wilson Philips – Hold on
“Don’t you know things can change,
Things’ll go your way,
If you hold on, for one more day
Can you hold on, for one more day
Things’ll go your way”
It’s literally telling you just to hold on, tomorrow will be better, its not always going to be like this.
Best day of my life – American Authors
“But all the possibilities
No limits, just epiphanies”
These are my favourite lines. So, you might not be having the best time of your life, but this is telling you that there are no limits – you could do everything if you really wanted to. And the realisation that this could, and can happen. When you achieve something, however small, give yourself credit, let that be your epiphany! Anxiety, panic or low self esteem may be holding you back, but it doesn’t have to. Trying something small – however small – can be so uplifting!
Lighthouse family – High
“When you’re close to tears remember,
Some day it’ll all be over,
One day we’re gonna get so high”
Remember the day
When we close to the edge
And we’ll wonder how we made it through”
There’s light at the end of the tunnel. We need to believe this and these lyrics are helping us trust in this. Listen to the whole song, it will help you realise that how you feel isn’t it for ever.
Heroes – David Bowie
“Though nothing will drive them away,
We can beat them, just for one day
We can be heroes, just for one day”
This is one of those strong songs that we can apply to anyone and anything at anytime. We may be suffering, but we have the ability to be a hero. Even if for just a short amount of time.
These are just a few my of my favourite songs to listen to, but chose your own and bring it out when needed.
Find a happy place
Again this sounds so cheesy, but you must have somewhere that makes you smile, that makes you feel safe or comfortable. It could be somewhere as simple as a comfy armchair at home with a good view, or somewhere you have been in your life, that you can picture in your mind.
When I was having my first anxieties – a long time ago – it was at the point that going out, became very difficult, crowded places and lots of people made me very anxious. I was doing my beauty therapy training in London, and having t go on the London Underground every day – I was in an awful place, and my self confidence and self esteem suffered.
I had a picture of a large ‘prairie’, open space – somewhere that I imagine you would find somewhere in middle America? I think it was just on a leaflet I had received – it wasn’t anything or anywhere particular. The picture was black and white and there a was a small shed-like building in the middle, but that was all, it was just a large open space.
I began to feel really low about my anxieties, so I pictured myself there. I imagined warm weather, with a warm wind blowing. I imagined it was just me there, no-one else, miles from anywhere. I wished I was there, rather than facing my anxieties at the time. But it became somewhere I could escape to, in my mind. I don’t have the picture anymore, but I can still imagine it. Even just looking up at the sky helps me – large open spaces, a wide expanse of sky, make me feel better. So think of your place and escape there when you need to.
For more simple, out of the ordinary, exciting, and safe ways to encourage self-care READ THIS ARTICLE!
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|About the Author |
Alison Angold is a fully qualified (certified) beauty therapist, massage therapist, and aromatherapist from the UK. She has over 25 years of experience in this industry and has worked in a variety of beauty salons, spa’s as well as running her own successful beauty and massage business. Her career has allowed her to treat many, many clients, with skincare concerns, medical conditions, and a whole variety of other ailments and issues, which has enabled her to work closely with essential oils, prescribing specific blends for these clients to help with these conditions. Her qualifications in the use of essential oils and aromatherapy, allow her to share this knowledge with others, in a safe, reliable way.